postheadericon Dear Dr. Romance: He said I was a false friend.


Last year, he disagreed with some advice I gave him. He said I was a false friend, that proved that I didn’ t care about him at all, and a lot of other accusations. I let it go.

When he was diagnosed with cancer, and I was by his side all the time, encouraging him to eat
right and follow the treatment he wanted to abandon. I went to his city so we could meet, but he didn’ t give me a single call during four days I was there. He told me he had surgery but he never let me know in advance.

Dear Reader:

Thank you for reading my blog.

Author’ s Bio:

Tina B. Tessina, Ph. D. is a licensed psychotherapist in S. California since 1978 with over 30 years experience in counseling individuals and couples and author of 13 books in 17 languages, including It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction; The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again; Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting About the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage, The Commuter Marriage, and her newest, Love Styles: How to Celebrate Your Differences. She writes the “Dr. Romance” blog, and the “Happiness Tips from Tina” email newsletter.

Dr. Tessina, is CRO (Chief Romance Officer) for LoveForever. com, a website designed to strengthen relationships and guide couples through the various stages of their relationship with personalized tips, courses, and online couples counseling. Online, she’s known as “Dr. Romance” Dr. Tessina appears frequently on radio, and such TV shows as “Oprah”, “Larry King Live” and ABC News.

postheadericon Are You Changing Enough?


It’s very interesting to me to watch couples struggle and go around and around… I find that this happens with the ones where partners refuse to take ownership of their own contribution to their relationship’s status quo and are fixated with having their partner change… These are the partners that also are waiting for the magic pill and for me to fix their partner. I have a bit of news for these partners – it ain’t gonna happen!

When partners wait for the other to change, they are waiting. When they wait, they are wasting the moment and the opportunity to have something different – right there and then! If this resonates a bit with you, in that you are waiting for something different in the interaction, I implore YOU to do something differently, to mindfully, respectfully, caringly, and compassionately reach out to your partner about it.

When an interaction is going south, take a step back and see how you are provoking the situation. How you are inviting your partner’s reaction. How you are pushing their buttons, triggering them. How you are hurting your partner. Instead of focusing on how your partner is going about this all wrong, stop your approach and try something different – the more loving and compassionate approach. We all just want to be understood, accepted and loved at the end of the day. Give that to your partner

Please STOP your approach NOW and try something different. Stop going at it from a wounded, deprived, violated and entitled perspective and be NICE! YOU invest TLC. YOU invest compassion, understanding, love, and affection. YOU start and continue to use your partner’s love language and stick to it no matter what. YOU have the power to invite your partner to a different moment. YOU have the power to break the impasse and seduce your partner. YOU CAN DO IT!

Remember, challenging situations are opportunities for healing, growth, and change. Go about this as if this was a course on change you want to ace. Make believe each interaction is a test… Prep for it, research, get your resources, be at your best, and a have a plan of action to ace your test… Give it your all. Give it your genuine, Authentic all, not your egocentric all… Stop waiting and change your relationship right now.

Complete the MetroRelationship (sm) Assignment below to help you effortlessly implement this, make changes and immediately start experiencing your spectacular relationship. Share your thoughts and progress on our blog page!

Happy Changing!

Author’ s Bio:

About Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT (Metropolitan MFT)
I’ m the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC (Metropolitan MFT), a private psychotherapy practice specializing in working with couples. I help couples succeed at their relationship by assisting them get on the same page and deeply understand each other, repair hurts, create intimacy, stay connected, share passion, and tap into their synergy. I specialize in pre-marital, codependence, reactivity / anger, and infidelity work.

postheadericon Dear Dr. Romance: How do I handle jealousy?


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Dear Reader:

Author’ s Bio:

Tina B. Tessina, Ph. D. is a licensed psychotherapist in S. California since 1978 with over 30 years experience in counseling individuals and couples and author of 13 books in 17 languages, including It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction; The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again; Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting About the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage, The Commuter Marriage, and her newest, Love Styles: How to Celebrate Your Differences. She writes the “Dr. Romance” blog, and the “Happiness Tips from Tina” email newsletter.

Dr. Tessina, is CRO (Chief Romance Officer) for LoveForever. com, a website designed to strengthen relationships and guide couples through the various stages of their relationship with personalized tips, courses, and online couples counseling. Online, she’s known as “Dr. Romance” Dr. Tessina appears frequently on radio, and such TV shows as “Oprah”, “Larry King Live” and ABC News.

postheadericon ***A Dating Coach’s Reflections on twelve Years of her Marriage!

We have had our ups and downs and some big challenges. Challenges that I have seen sever other marriages: starting a business that took years to get off the floor; 5 years of fertility treatments, as well as looking at other options such as adoption; job losses due to the nature of the husband’s volatile work environment; health issues; and a challenging child with special requirements. And both of us are far from perfect with our warts on both in our sides.

When I trainer with my clients, I educate them to look for the values which are important to them that need to be in-line with a life partner and those that may vary that need to be supported. My husband and I reveal those critical core relationship beliefs. The ones that are different, he supports.

So far we made it through the 7 year itch as well as the terrible tens! I don’t know what difficulties, disappointments or joys are forward for us. However , I do know we every have a commitment to the relationship and to our son to nurture plus protect this relationship.

Author’ s Biography:

postheadericon The reason why Do “Friends” Often Turn Out To Be “Energy Vampires”?


Are you one of those people who craves to have friends around you any most of the time? If so have you ever wondered exactly what motivates your craving? Have you ever asked yourself how discriminating you are when it comes to the types of people you choose to invite into your life and into your energetic space?

Well if you feel a lot more frustrated, annoyed, unheard, depleted, embarrassed, diminished, invisible and so on after spending time with your “ friends” then it probably means your choices have been less than critical.

So why do people choose to spend time with others who diminish rather than invigorate, uplift, and energize them?

Well when there is a “ need to have friends” based on:

1 . The fear to be alone.

2 . The need to be loved liked or valued.

3. The need to be studied care of or rescued.

4. The need to feel like part of something.

5. The need to be accepted.

6. The worry of being left out.

7. The need to be valued and/or authenticated.

How can one enhance their capability to accurately discern who is right and who is not?

Properly discernment is based on the ability to feel how another person affects your Life Force Energy or what is generally called “ one’ s energy”. I’ meters sure the term “ energy vampire” is familiar to you. Energy vampires are individuals who consciously or subconsciously feed off of other peoples’ energy in order to make themselves feel whole, total, powerful, superior, impressive, and so on.

The reasons listed above for being drawn into such relationships in the first place are usually rooted in early negative experiences in your life, stored as negative memories, that have programmed you in those ways i. e. to feel afraid and needy.

Basically said that all of those experiences actually endure in the way of you ever being liberated to feel at ease and to draw the right kind of friends into your life how would that feel to you? Probably annoying because there is no way to undo individuals experiences is there?

Properly that’ s where the story requires a dramatic turn. It’ s actually possible to permanently release individuals negative experiences from within once and for all with a new process called the Mind Resonance Process® (MRP).

This will not only spontaneously help you to feel and be more critical but it will literally change the quality of individuals who you draw into your sphere of friends.

If you would like to experience this process kindly visit the web link below where you can choose a free introductory telephone/Skype coaching discussion.

Author’ t Bio:

Nick Arrizza, a former Doctor and Medical Doctor, is an International Specialist Self Empowerment Life Coach, Romantic relationship and Spiritual Tele-Coach, Author as well as the developer of the powerful Mind Reverberation Process® (MRP).

A Free 1 Hour Introductory MRP Telephone/Skype Coaching Consultation And Free Copy of My E-book are available upon request (You will be asked to protect your own long distance telephone charges)

postheadericon Beloved Dr . Romance: I want to find me personally


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Dear Reader:

It sounds like you’ re using responsibility for your dishonesty, which is a great start. There is probably a way to make it up to your guy, and have a good chance of working it away with him.

You will find good reasons to lie to a companion (no, dear you don’ big t look as if you’ re obtaining older) and bad reasons (I have no idea how that happened towards the car. ) The trick is to know which you’ re doing. Informing the truth is not always easy, and, within rare cases, not wise. However we should all learn how to do it, plus know when to ‘ fess up, and when to keep your lips zipped.

Usually, the betrayal involved in finding out a key is more damaging than what happens whenever you tell the truth.

Laying to your partner about whether you might have broken an agreement does more damage than breaking the agreement. If you slide up, tell the truth and know how to make an effective apology.

Here are 4 Steps to an effective apology:

1 . Surrender for your responsibility. When you become aware that you have made a mistake, admit it plus apologize. Use it as an opportunity to learn and grow. You don’t have to be scared of punishment or rejection – apologizing makes it easier to be forgiven.

3. Follow the following design for apology:
2. Admit your mistake: Speak straight to the person to whom you need to apologize.
* State what you did (so the person knows you’re aware)
* Say you’re apologies
* Do a re-take: Explain what change you’ll make to repair it, and so it won’t take place again
* Say “I hope you can forgive me. ”

4. If that doesn’t work, ask the other person what he or she wants you to apologize intended for (in case you misunderstood your own mistake)

Author’ s Bio:

Tina B. Tessina, Ph. D. is a licensed psychotherapist within S. California since 1978 along with over 30 years experience in counseling individuals and couples and writer of 13 books in seventeen languages, including It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction; The particular Unofficial Guide to Dating Again; Cash, Sex and Kids: Stop Combating About the Three Things That Can Mess up Your Marriage, The Commuter Marriage, and her newest, Love Styles: How to Celebrate Your Differences. The girl writes the “Dr. Romance” weblog, and the “Happiness Tips from Tina” email newsletter.

Doctor Tessina, is CRO (Chief Romance Officer) for LoveForever. com, a web site designed to strengthen relationships and information couples through the various stages of their relationship with personalized tips, courses, and online couples counseling. Online, she’s known as “Dr. Romance” Doctor Tessina appears frequently on radio, and such TV shows as “Oprah”, “Larry King Live” and ABC Information.

postheadericon The particular Blame Game Theory © 2014


We live in a world where we make our own choices that decide our future but it doesn’ t not always turn out the way all of us anticipate it. Did we make a move wrong or was it somebody else who prevented that dream or goal of being achieved? The fact continues to be we have two choices to choose from whenever deciding who is to blame for something not really going right, ourselves or someone else. Let’ s explore each of those options.

Let’ s start with blaming others. Some people find a feeling of closure when someone will be given the blame for something that goes wrong. It seems like the simple selection to make and we do not have to feel bad about ourselves either. We may rely on others to help us through tough times but their advice can cause more harm than good. It’ t only fitting that the person who provided the bad advice should be held accountable. You can feel better about yourself seeing as you were not the cause of the misfortune therefore you are ready to move on.

It appears as though I am justifying the fact that placing the particular blame on someone is OK. In fact , I am trying to prove a place that too often we look for somebody else to blame rather than ourselves. Don’ to get me wrong in some instances (i. e. cheating, lying, backstabbing, etc) there are legitimate reasons to place the blame on someone but those are deliberate methods that have an intent. To place the blame on someone else because we are as well selfish or arrogant to hold ourselves accountable seems to be the preferred method by many.

As humans all of us tend to fear the word failure so to avoid succumbing to the negative facets of it we blame someone else. It’ s the easy way out and those who may have the ability to blame someone else and feel great about it are likely to be somewhat sociopath. That will seems a bit harsh but it has its own truth to it. People do not like at fault themselves or hold themselves accountable in some situations. Do we know the reason why people do this?

I actually can’ t speak for everyone otherwise but we need to be held more accountable for our actions. People who had been born in the 1980′ s had been taught what respect is and when you chose to be disrespectful you had been likely to find yourself getting slapped, spanked, grounded or even your mouth washed out with cleaning soap. It was unheard of where a parent sat back and let their child blame others for their actions. Each child happened accountable and swiftly punished. Right now don’ t get me began on today’ s generation because that is another whole theory by itself.

I might sound recurring but the fact remains we have the opportunity to make our own decisions. We can choose what advice to take and which not to. No one is holding that gun to our heads and telling us that is how we will do it. If we choose to take some one’ t advice it’ s because all of us chose to not because we had to. We must hold ourselves accountable for our own actions rather than placing the blame on someone else. When we blame others we are running from our own anxieties or problems. Guess what? You have just yourself to blame because you chose to get it done that way, you made your own choice, you chose not to change, and the end it’ s all upon you.

STOP playing the particular blame game because unless you are a marionette and everyone around you will be pulling your strings and doing the talking for you, the choices you make are your decisions not their own. That mentality is a tough one to swallow for some and if they choose not to make changes and hold themselves accountable then they will find themselves repeating problem after problem. They might seek sympathy after and we will make it for them but we are only allowing them. They need to be held accountable and they need to recognize they have just themselves to blame. It’ s a hard lesson to learn but it’ t the only way they will learn.

Author’ s Bio:

I was delivered and raised in Lewiston, Maine. Throughout my childhood I was an avid baseball enthusiast spending most of my childhood actively playing on the baseball diamond. As I grew older I began encircling personally with many friends to whom might turn to me whether in good times or bad. It was my enthusiasm and caring attitude that provided my friends that shoulder to cry on and that person to turn to during difficult and negative situations. I tend to wear my center on my sleeve and my friends could always rely on me to assist them out, anyway I could, whatever the situation. I always offered my make to cry on, my place to sleep, my table to eat from and my ear to listen to. It had been this dedication and devotion to my friends that made me a buddy you could always rely on.

postheadericon How To Start Making Healthy Relationship Choices


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There they generate negative beliefs about you such as: I’ m unlovable, I’ m inadequate, I’ m unattractive, I’ m unwanted, I’ meters unworthy and so on. Those negative and self destructive beliefs subconsciously obstruct your ability to make discerning and healthy choices and magnetically draw to you exactly the kind of men which will confirm those beliefs for you.

You, see if you sensed unworthy and you were to actually find somebody who was healthy then something inside would take charge of you and cause you to sabotage that connection because, all things considered, deep down you believe you are “ unworthy” of having such a fulfilling romantic relationship. Alternately you may find yourself drawing precisely what this internal program has planned for you; guys who are unhealthy and possibly unavailable.

By the way, this system is also what drives many matters.

Now there is a way to free yourself from this self destructive pattern which is simple, effective and long lasting. It does however require a degree of bravery; the courage to face the painful past and permanently erase this! You see by erasing negative remembrances responsible for, say, feelings of unworthiness, those feelings completely disappear and also you begin feeling whole, complete, deserving, good about yourself, attractive, open up, confident, and so on.

So, just how does one do that?

A decade ago a new coaching process was developed that has the capacity to permanently remove negative memories like those discussed above and set you and your relationship living on an entirely new and fulfilling course. To learn more about this kindly go to the website below where you can request a free introductory telephone/Skype consultation that will begin to take you there.

Author’ s Bio:

Nick Arrizza, a former Psychiatrist and Medical Doctor, is an International Expert Self Empowerment Life Coach, Relationship and Spiritual Tele-Coach, Author and the developer of the powerful Mind Resonance Process® (MRP).

A Free one hour Introductory MRP Telephone/Skype Coaching Consultation And Free Copy of My E-book are available upon request (you actually will be asked to cover your own long distance telephone charges)

postheadericon Closing Shyness – How To Be Your own Spontaneous Confident Self


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Many therapists and coaches who are attempting to help individuals overcome their shyness have taken the view that:

1 ) It is not possible to fully over arrive it,

2 . Which is has something to do with having inadequate social skills and,

a few. That social skills classes help you become more socially adept and therefore help you feel less shy and much less anxious.

It is the strong opinion that shyness has absolutely nothing to do with social skills!

I know this first hand as I suffered from paralyzing shyness most of my life but no longer. As hard since you may find this to believe it is no more inside of me and I feel completely free.

Deep inside each individual there is already “ built in” an image of how they would like to see on their own being with others. If you are a person who has a shyness problem just go inside and allow yourself to bring up the vision of how you would like to see your self be in public.

I’ m sure you will have little if any problems doing this.

This inner image is what I call your Spontaneous Genuine Self.

You see “ knowing” how you want be is not the problem.

The problem is “ being” that way, isn’ t it?

The thing that blocks one from being that way is the internal set of beliefs that frighten you out of simply calming and being your preferred Spontaneous Authentic Self.

This set of beliefs becomes “ pre-programmed” at an early age and acts like an internal “ horror” movie that interferes and distorts your perception of the external world thus making you think that it is more dangerous than it actually is.

It is only by releasing this “ internal movie” you will be free to relax and be your Natural Genuine Self.

A brand new modality called the Mind Resonance Procedure (MRP) which I administer over the telephone was designed exactly for this purpose. If you would like to try out a taste of freedom today kindly visit the web link below and set up your free 1 hour introductory telephone/Skype coaching consultation.

Author’ s Bio:

Computer chip Arrizza, a former Psychiatrist and Medical professional, is an International Expert Self Empowerment Life Coach, Relationship and Spiritual Tele-Coach, Author and the developer from the powerful Mind Resonance Process® (MRP).

A Free one hour Introductory MRP Telephone/Skype Coaching Discussion And Free Copy of Our E-book are available upon request (You will be asked to cover your own long distance telephone charges)

postheadericon ***So, You Want a Sexy Voice?

There was a movie from the 80’s known as Victor/Victoria in which one of the characters was a extremely sexy woman who sounded just like a bimbo. You can see the reaction of her lover who finds her tone of voice annoying. At this point in the film, they have lost interest in her and is switched off by her nasal, whiny, childlike sound. Unfortunately, she is incapable of conveying herself with a sensuous tone due to the irritating qualities of her tone of voice.

When you consider all the great voices which have the sensual quality, like that of Kathleen Turner, Cher, George Clooney, Ashley Judd, Kate Beckinsale, and the late great Barry White, there is one feature which they all share: depth. Not one of these voices is high-pitched. Each one falls within the lower register associated with his/her speaking range.

Most people are not using their ‘real’ or ‘true’ voice which means that the message of their habitual voice is higher than it should be. You have a deeper voice within you and it falls within your optimum range. It is merely a matter of actually finding it.

Indeed, tone matters but your vocal instrument is where the quality lies. Change how you place your sound and you will be stunned just how hot your voice can be!

Author’ s i9000 Bio: